My mother was not allowed to study beyond 3rd standard because when she was in school, a girl studying in her village school in 5th standard ran away with a teacher. When she grew up and had all of us as children, she wanted us to study well.
My father was the only male child from 3 of our grandfathers. My grandparents obviously wanted him to look after cultivation of our lands. For this reason they did not want him to study beyond 8th standard. He rebelled and ran away from the house to Rishikesh and got admission in an Ayurveda College run by Baba Kale Kambaliwale. Stay, food and education in this college was free.
My father soon became a renowned Ayurvedic doctor, served thousands of patients in our area, brought good name to his parents and managed cultivation of our lands as well.
Rebellion, not succumbing to dictates of his father and grandfather, gave him great opportunity.
In the meantime his younger brother was also borne (younger by 16 years). My father knew the importance of education and wanted him and my elder brothers and sister to study well.
My uncle was sent for higher studies (9th onwards) to Dehradun and my elder brothers and sister were also sent to hostels in Haridwar from primary classes itself.
My mother was in fact so particular about disciplined studies that whenever my eldest brother ran away from his college, she would not allow him to stay in the house even if it was night. She would force him and accompany him back to college. Whenever any of us bunked any class, she would scold us severely and often beat us up.
In spite of all the strictness and sincere efforts of my parents, my uncle left his studies after 12th and came home to look after his share of lands in the village. My elder brothers and sister also did not do well. My eldest brother did not even clear High School.
And I and my younger brother and sisters, because of lack of finances (all elders were studying in city and living in hostels), had to study in the village school and devote substantial time and effort to cultivation and tending to cattle.
Of them also, I alone did well in my studies - with no mentoring, pushing or use of force by the parents.
My eldest Jijaji was an intelligent, cultured, humorous and hard working man. We were always impressed by him.
One monsoon season, Gangaji changed its course a bit and his lands were swept away and became Gangaji. He was not bogged down by this huge loss and to maintain or improve upon his financial status took large tracts of lands on lease for cultivation and managed bank finance for cultivation and purchase of a tractor. Crop grew well and suddenly at the time of harvesting there were repeated showers of unseasonal rains. Whole crop was destroyed. He could not pay lease rentals to land owners and bank EMIs.
Even in such adverse circumstances he did not loose self belief and initiative. With his interpersonal skills and honesty of purpose, he convinced landlords to allow him lease of another year when he will pay them for both the years. Convinced bank also to reschedule repayment of loan.
He did well again. Crop again came up well and something happened which was unbelievable. Rarest of rare occurrence - unseasonal rains again destroyed his harvested crop lying in the fields.
He was broken, chased by creditors, confined himself to the house and died in miserable conditions. Things had come to such a pass that one of his sons had to work as an agricultural labour.
In due course one of his sons and one daughter did reasonably well and things are reasonably OK after his death!
As mentioned a little earlier, my eldest brother did not pass High School. He was lazy and failed in all activities through out his life.
My bhabhi on the other hand is a very loving, caring, contented and hard working lady. She continued to be that way and remained cheerful amidst severe financially difficult situations - just imagine state of a lady who has two sons and two daughters and whose husband does not earn enough to meet their daily needs.
With HIS grace, both the daughters are happily married - their husbands are doing well. Both the sons did ITI courses, are employed and married to good natured girls. Family atmosphere is excellent.
Their elder son-in-law at the time marriage was a PTI (Physical Training Instructor) in Central School. Soon, he got a posting to a terrorist infested area in J&K. For this reason, he resigned from that Govt Job. Everybody was worried at his decision and uncertain future. Nobody, however, came in the way of his decision.
He wanted to do some business with meagre capital which he could manage. He sought my help in getting some agency which I could not assure. He started on his own and is today biggest dealer of white goods in Haridwar. Loss of job - seemingly negative event - opened huge opportunities for him.
Scriptures says that events unfold according to one's prarabdha (fate).
No one can really change the course of events - cannot shape the lives of their children or organisations.
If one reflects back, one would find it to be true.
The scriptures further expound that when one's aspirations and efforts happen to be in line with whatever is going to happen (according to prarabdha), one feels as if the desired outcome is due to his intelligence and effort. An illusion of success is created. One feels happy and has false sense of attainment. It is something like situation of a dog who walking with and in the shade of a bullock cart thinks that he is carrying the cart!
On the other hand when one's aspirations and efforts happen to be different than what is going to happen, one has illusion of failure.
There is thus no success or failure but only illusions of success or failure.
One only feels happy at illusion of success or feels dejected and depressed at illusion of failure.
Somewhat evolved souls have trust in the Divine Will - result of lives times of humble submission to higher principles - as Gaur Saheb would say. These souls simply carry on happily with their lives as life unfolds.
On the other hand not so evolved souls carry on stains of strong ego, insist on managing situations and learn their lessons hard way after much suffering.
Life is a mystery. No one knows what is good and what is bad (right or wrong) until life unfolds.
Supeji has written a small and beautiful poem on this. The poem runs thus.
"When life unfolds,
all things indistinct, all things in
the wrong and seemingly erroneous
Become right.
Everything is so-imprecise, unhappy
until life unfolds.
Once life unfolds, all is well!
We just wait ... ungrudging, unjudging, surrendering!
As mentioned in Part-I of this post, I am blessed that whenever life unfolded in a dimension different then what I preferred, I could sincerely follow the available course without much rancour or regret.
And found life to be wonderful!
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