Monday, April 27, 2015

क्या, मैं नहीं हूँ!

किसी ने रमण महऋषी से पूछा, क्या जीवन में सभी कुछ भाग्य के अनुसार घटित होता है या उसमें व्यक्ति की free will का भी कोई रोल है। महऋषी ने कुछ इस प्रकार जवाब दिया – तुम तो हो ही नहीं, फिर तुम्हारी free will का प्रश्न ही कहाँ उठता है?
 
उनके कहने का मतलब था कि एक परमात्मा ही अलग अलग रूपों में अपने आप को अभिव्यक्त (manifest) करता है। जो भी इस जगत में आँख से देखा जा सकता है, वह सिर्फ दिखाई देता है, वास्तव में है नहीं। वह  अकेला ही exist करता है और जो भी होता हुआ मालूम पडता है वह उसकी लीला है। उसके अलावा कोई है ही नहीं। ऐसी स्थिती में non-existent beings (mere appearances) के द्वारा कुछ किये जाने का का प्रश्न ही कैसे उठ सकता है।
 
इसको समुद्र और उसमें दिखाई देने वाली लहरों के रूप में समझा जा सकता है। वास्तव में लहर नहीं होती, पानी का ही तल कहीं थोडा ऊँचा होता है, कहीं नीचा।  इस बात को इस प्रकार भी कह सकते हैं कि समुद्र में लहरे नहीं होती, समुद्र लहराता है। लहर सिर्फ एक आभास मात्र है, सिर्फ दिखाई पडती है, वास्तव में होती नहीं।
 
अपने एक अलग व्यक्तित्व के अहसास को, मैं हूँ’, इस भाव को शास्त्र अज्ञान की मूल ग्रंथी (central knot of ignorance) बतलाते हैं। इसी से मेरे का भाव, राग-द्वेश और उनसे पैदा होने वाली सारी समस्यायें महसूस होती हैं। लेकिन हम अपनी बुद्धी से कितना भी सोचें, हमें अपने होने से ज्यादा सच तो कुछ भी नहीं लगता।
 
Confusion is further confounded when शास्त्र परमात्मा के साथ साथ आत्मा और जीव की बात भी करते हैं। यही नहीं, कर्मों के अनुसार पुनर्जन्म और प्रारब्ध के अनुसार कर्म फल की भी बात करते हैं। अगर व्यक्ति है ही नहीं, तो आत्मा क्या है और पुनर्जन्म किसका होता है?
 
इन्हीं सभी complex प्रश्नों का उत्तर श्रीमद्भागवत्‌ [4:22:22 से 34] में एक जगह बडे ही सरल, संक्षिप्त  और सुंदर रूप में मिलता है। सरल शब्दों में इसे इस प्रकार समझा जा सकता है।
 
जिस प्रकार दर्पण के कारण object का एक प्रतिबिम्ब दिखाई देता है, होता नहीं, वैसे ही सुक्ष्म या लिंग शरीर (subtle body) के कारण, जीवात्मा परमात्मा के प्रतिबिम्ब के रूप में मालूम पडती है। जीव की प्रतिबिम्ब की भांति कोई स्वतंत्र सत्ता नहीं होती। और जैसे प्रतिबिम्ब कोई स्वतंत्र action नहीं कर सकता, object का action ही प्रतिबिम्ब में भी दिखाई देगा, उसी प्रकार जीव का भी कोई स्वतंत्र action नहीं हो सकता, जो action जीव के द्वारा होता हुआ मालूम पडता है, वास्तव में वह action  परमात्मा का ही action है।

जब तक दर्पण है, प्रतिबिम्ब देखाई देता है उसके बाद नहीं। ठीक उसी प्रकार “जब तक अंतःकरणरूप उपाधि रहती है, तभी तक पुरुषको जीवात्मा, इंद्रियों के विषय और इन दोनों का सम्बंध कराने वाले अहंकार का अनुभव होता है उसके बाद नहीं”। अतः जीवात्मा और अहंकार यानि मैं भाव सिर्फ आभास मात्र है, वास्तव में है नहीं। लेकिन जब तक यह उपाधि है, आभास है, मै भाव स्वप्न की तरह बिल्कुल सत्य मालूम पडता है और सुख: दुख: का अनुभव भी बिल्कुल वास्तविक लगता है।

और यह उपाधि कैसे समाप्त हो, इस बारे में बताया गया है ‌- “परब्रह्ममें सुदृढ प्रीति हो जाने पर पुरुष सद्गुरु की शरण लेता है; फिर ज्ञान और वैराग्य के प्रबल वेग के कारण वासना शून्य हुए अपने अविद्यादि पाँच प्रकार के क्लेशों से युक्त अहंकारात्मक अपने लिंग शरीर को वह उसी प्रकार भस्म कर देता है, जैसे अग्नि लकडी से प्रकट होकर फिर उसी को जला डालती है”।

जब तक लिंग शरीर (subtle body) भस्म नहीं होता, तब तक वह अलग अलग योनियों में जन्म पाता है अर्थात्‌ उसमें परमात्मा अलग अलग जीवों के रूप में भासित होता रहता है।

लिंग शरीर के भस्म होने का साधन बताया गया है ज्ञान और वैराग्य को। ज्ञान और वैराग्य उत्पन्न होता है सद्गुरु की शरण लेने से और सद्गुरु की शरण मिलती है परमात्मा में सुदृढ प्रीति से यानी भक्तिसे। और व्यक्ति में भक्ति कैसे पैदा हो इसके जो मुख्य उपाय बताये गये हैं उनमें सबसे पहला स्थान है श्रीहरि के भक्तों और संतों का संग। उसके अलावा जो उपाय हैं उनमें शास्त्रों का पठन; गुरु और शास्त्र के वचनों में विश्वास; श्रीहरि की पावन कथाओं को बार बार पढना, कहना और सुनना; एकांत में प्रेम रखना; योग क्षेम के लिये प्रयत्न न करना (जो प्रारब्धवश मिल जाये उसी में संतुष्ट रहना) आदि सम्मिलित हैं।

यहाँ इस बात का जिक्र करना भी उचित होगा की भक्ति का अर्थ भगवान की usual पूजा प्रार्थना तक सीमित नहीं है। परमहंस नित्यानंदजी ने एक बार बताया था कि वे सभी उपाय और प्रयास जिनसे व्यक्ति उस वास्तविक परम सत्ता के अनुसंधान और अनुभव के लिये प्रयास करता है, वे सभी प्रभु की भक्ति में सम्मिलित हैं।

भक्ति के फल और महिमा और भक्ति पाने के साधन के बारे में, तुलसीदास जी ने भी रामचरितमानस के उत्तरकांड में लिखा है:


“भगति  करत बिनु जतन प्रयासा। संसृति मूल  अबिद्या  नासा॥

भोजन करिअ तृपिति हित लागी। जिमि सो असन पचवै जठरागी॥

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मोरें  मन  प्रभु  अस  बिस्वासा। राम ते अधिक राम कर दासा॥

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सब कर फल हरि  भगति सुहाई। सो  बिनु  संत न काहूँ  पाई॥

अस बिचारि  जोइ कर सतसंगा। राम भगति तेहि सुलभ बिहंगा॥
 
अर्थात्‌ भक्ति करने से संसृति (जन्म मृत्युरूप संसार) की जड अविद्या बिना ही यत्न और परिश्रम के (अपने आप) वैसे ही नष्ट हो जाती है, जैसे भोजन किया तो जाता है तृप्ति के लिये और उस भोजन को जठराग्नि अपने आप (बिना हमारी चेष्टा के) पचा डालती है।

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हे प्रभो! मेरे मन में तो ऐसा विश्वास है कि श्रीरामजी के दास श्रीरामजी से भी बढकर हैं।

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सब साधनों का फल सुंदर हरिभक्ति ही है। उसे संत के बिना किसी ने नहीं पाया। ऐसा विचारकर जो भी संतों का संग करता है, हे गरुडजी! उसके लिये श्रीरामजी की भक्ति सुलभ हो जाती है”।


अतः श्रीहरि के भक्तों और संतों के संग (उनके संग से और जो कुछ भी करना जरूरी होगा, अपने आप होने लगेगा) से व्यक्ति आसानी जीवन के परम उद्देश्य (अविद्या यानी मैं भाव से मुक्ति – realisation of oneness of everything) की ओर अग्रसर हो सकता है।


 

Friday, April 24, 2015

Rasau va Sah

To a friend who is a spiritual seeker from young age and did not wish to get married – got married under instructions of his guru.

While describing the nature of Supreme being, the Upnisads say - Rasau va sah – He is Rasa.  The pleasure one gets through listening to the music is an echo of His Rasa.  The pleasure one gets through the copulation is a reflection of His Rasa.  If one follows the Rasa and dives deeper into it with awareness, one reaches its source, i.e., Him.  It is on this truth that many of the methods of meditation in Tantra Sutra are based.

Everything that exists – planets, plants, human beings, thought, greed, lust, compassion etc. – is manifestation of the same energy, i.e., Him.  Tantra, therefore, speaks of total acceptance.  To reject anything from the existence is His rejection.  When all seeming contradictions are supported by Him, who is man to accept something and reject others.  The idea of good and bad is created by the society for maintaining social order.  Intrinsically nothing is good and nothing is bad.  That is why social norms for conduct are not applicable to the seekers.

We fear enjoyment of objects and relationships, as in our experience they become bondage – one becomes habituated and seeks more of them.  Sooner than later such enjoyment results in boredom and suffering.  That is why on spiritual path, one is often advised to renounce objects and relationships.  But this is the path for the escapists.  More often than not for a person on the path of renunciation with advancing age and weakening willpower, the temptation and desires become irrepressible and one suffers more than ordinary worldly people. 

There are, however, a few seekers who tread the path of renunciation from the beginning and succeed.  They in fact are the one’s who have passed through the process of enjoyment of worldly objects and rose above their desires in earlier births.  They are not our role models.  That is why, your Guru advised you to enter the life of a Grahstha.  Professor Mungale also hinted at this.

No doubt, as Budha says, the desire is root cause of all suffering.  But to overcome desire one need not give up enjoyment.  Enjoyment with awareness is what fulfills and liberates.  If one holds back oneself while enjoying, remembering that one day one has to leave it, will not be fully into it and miss the point.  Anything done partially leaves the mind unsatisfied and the mind hankers for it.  This way one will never be free.  Total acceptance is the key as mentioned earlier.

In fact it is not the physical act which results in a consequence, i.e., Karma but the mental response.  Any act done without the sense of doer ship does not result in any Karma.  For example an army personnel kills enemy as a part of his duty, he is not affected by that.  This is what Krishna tells Arjuna.  In the same way it is not the physical act between man and woman which has adverse effect on Sadhana but the fantasy attached with it that has an adverse effect.  During our Himalayan excursion, Nityanandji explained this aspect and said that we have to be free of sensual fantasies and not the act of physically coming together with spouse.  In fact it is much easier to come out of fantasies and pursue Sadhana if physical aspect of sex is taken care of through the institution of marriage.

It is well known that most of our Rishis were men with families.  Devhuti, daughter of first king of this srishti, namely, Manu was married to a Brahamin Rishi, Kardamji.  Nine daughters were born to them who were married to the Rishis namely Marichi, Atri, Angire, Pulastya, Bhrigu, Vashistha etc [Bhagavatam (III.24 – 22 to 24)].

As mentioned earlier, it is much easier to be free of lust as a Grahstha than as a renunciant.  In Bhagavatam (III.14 – 19 & 20) Rishi Kashyap tells his wife Diti appreciating her contribution in his life – “It is very difficult for the persons in other Ashramas to subjugate the enemies in the form of Indriyas but it is won with ease with the help of one’s married wife and that one cannot repay this favour in this life or the life after.”

So true!

Another secret of successful life is that in a man woman relationship what is most important is mutual respect and appreciation of each others contribution in life.  Most relationships fail, become sour or indifferent because we take things for granted.  One should be grateful for everything done by the other.  One should approach one’s spouse with love (devotion).

While coming to the physical aspect of relationship, it becomes satisfying if one enjoys the touch.  The process of intercourse is momentary and does not leave one fully satisfied – mind therefore hankers for repetition.  On the other hand, one can remain in touch with once spouse for long time prior to or after intercourse or at any other time.  Most of the women in fact want to be in physical touch after the intercourse.  When the touch is accompanied by love, affection and a feeling of gratefulness; one is wholly with the experience of touch – mind does not wander.  This is one of the most effective methods of meditation.  Enjoy the life to the fullest with awareness and rise above!

Thursday, April 23, 2015

Awareness is the key to better relationships

For making a relationship work, usually all of us make some adjustments, compromises and sacrifices.  This naturally gives rise to the expectation that such acts be reciprocated or at least appreciated.  Relationships often turn sour or become insipid because almost each one of us feels that other person does not reciprocate our feelings and efforts to make it better / work (for somewhat detailed discussion on this, one may refer to the post dated 10.04.2013 titled as ‘Wear Spirituality lightly’).  In that and in another post dated 05.07.2012 titled as ‘Living in Harmony – No Conflict, Compromise or Sacrifice’, there was a discussion on as to how to be in a harmonious relationship devoid of conflict, compromises and sacrifices.
 
Having clear understanding on the subject and having a very understanding and caring spouse, again one day, I found my mind seized for while by this kind of feeling – she does not appreciate.  Just an observation (this happens only if we pause to think) – awareness of the feeling – and it was immediately gone.  This (being aware of or observing the mechanics mind) is what is meant by ‘Gyan hi mukti hai’.  This also brings us to the point that mirror needs to be cleaned again and again as it goes on gathering dust with time.  In that relaxed state, I had put a cryptic feed on the facebook:
 
“In a relationship, we often complain that the other person does not appreciate our acts or qualities but never pause to think as to why do we have that expectation?”
 
It elicited an expected question from a friend:
 
“I want to know if there exists a 'relationship' without expectation...most people who cannot deal with expectation are not in relationships, only to then infer that if it is one then it cannot be devoid expectation.
 
My response to her was:
 
“Yes, there are relationships without expectations. Take the case of a relationship of a child with his maternal grandmother, grandma does not have any expectations from the child and it is one of the most joyous relationship for her. Similar is the case of a saint and his disciple.
 
People often have much less expectations from their son-in-laws and when it is so they enjoy beautiful relationship.
 
But take case of one's spouse or daughter-in-law, the situation is different as expectations are high.
 
If we pause and think we would readily find that satisfaction and joy in a relationship is inversely proportional to the expectations.
 
At the same time, you are right that it is natural to have expectations in a relationship. But the consequence in terms of suffering (disenchantment and frustration, as Chand Saheb has rightly observed) is also natural. That is why there is need to pause and think.
 
Now the natural question that arises is as to how not to have much expectation in a relationship?
 
It does not come easy. It requires serious understanding and pursuit on spiritual front.
 
As a first step one has know and realise that our lives unfold as per our own past Karmas and therefore none else is the cause of our happiness or sorrow. When this understanding seeps deeper, the expectations in relationships come down. It is to be followed by sustained Sadhana to have a joyous life where there are no expectations.
 
My friend did not pause to understand and think and continued clinging with her view that there cannot be relationship without expectations.  This evoked a very insightful response from our esteemed friend, Shri B P Gaur.  I am reproducing his response benefit of all of us:
 
“You raise some very pertinent issues! So, let me also add my two penny worth of ideas.
 
For a person harbouring "expectations" in a relationship wants ownership over the other person, who, at some point, chooses to act differently and upsets the apple cart.
 
For a person steeped in “expectation” a statement that one should not have any expectations in relationships is simply an unachievable state. He feels that giving up expectation amounts to losing all self-respect and becoming a door-mat. We all know how sensitive people are about their perceived self-respect.
 
People are in varying degrees of seekership, which is essentially a search for of lasting happiness (bliss would be a better term here). So, they have to approach the issue of relationships from where they currently stand.
 
As long as one feels that happiness comes through only when every relationship turns out according to one's expectations, even happy relationships are bound to turn stale or might sour. This leads to considerable agitation, heartburn, disappointment and sorrow. A person rooted in expectation will continue to hurtle from one disastrous relationship to another. Unhappiness and agitation sows the seeds of future unhappy relationships. This seems like an irreversible cycle over which a person has little control.
 
The question, therefore arises, what is the way out?
 
This is where better understanding comes in handy. Every person or situation is our life, happy or otherwise, has a purpose and is here to teach us a lesson. So, we have to approach people with the awareness that we do not own them and they have their own personal choices and free will which has to be respected. Awareness gives us the understanding how certain seemingly difficult relationships begin to improve if we reduce the stranglehold of our expectations and allow others more space.
 
Here, awareness is the key! It allows us to detach ourselves from our patterns of thought and behaviour and analyse the same dispassionately. As such, we learn where we have gone wrong and stop making the same mistakes.
 
As we become more and more aware it becomes increasingly easy to disengage ourselves (small egos) from relationships and see them in a better perspective.
 
It is not easy and many failures are to be encountered along the path. Yet, it is a path worth pursuing.
 
You wonder if a person, without expectation, is likely to have any relationship at all?
 
This question is nothing more than an obstacle created by the mind and needs to be put aside, for some time at least.
 
One who aspires to swim in a pool knows that in the beginning he is likely to suck some water through his nostrils and choke on it. If he dwells only up on this fear, he would not enter the pool. But the fear is needless. He who has put this fear aside enters the pool. Some day, he can be a proficient swimmer.
 
Much in the same way, all of us can learn how to become established in happy relationships. It cannot happen overnight. We are so much attached to our egos that if this ego were to be taken away at one stroke most of us would commit suicide. This is why God and Guru in their compassion have made the process of annihilation of ego slow. It happens, as Gurumayi once said to me, “Little by little!” We have to be grateful for that!!